The worst thing for a woman who is in a relationship with an abusive man is the fact that she may not even realize that she is in an abusive relationship, unless someone keeps reminding her that she is. That, unfortunately, is the tragedy behind such relationships. Dominating or controlling men can be perfect charmers, and that itself acts as a perfect foil for their abusive tendencies. Women who are dating or are married to such men will vouch for their sensitive and caring nature, and are mostly in denial about their partners being controlling. But there comes a time when each woman experiences the feeling of being stifled. It starts with a little jealousy. It moves on to interference. And before you know it, the man takes over your life like he owns it. It is therefore necessary to spot some warning signals early on in the relationship in order to make your escape before things get too complicated. Spot the Signs Early As mentioned before, such men tend to be natural charmers. Women usually find themselves besotted in the initial stages of the relationship. In the event of the slightest doubt, watch out for the following signals - » He expects to be your number one priority/ the center of your universe/ the only reason you're living for. » He wants to monitor your every activity and interaction, and expects you to report to him. He slowly ensures that your ties with your family members and friends are snapped. » While he continues to intrude in your everyday decisions, he resents any kind of interference on your part. » He makes sure that he shifts the blame of any fight on to you. Controlling men display the "I-am-always-right" attitude all the time. » He tends to exercise his control over the finances. Often he does not let his wife/girlfriend work. If she does, he tries to get hold of her money, thus making her dependent on him. » His insecurities lead him to become very suspicious. You are often asked to provide lengthy explanations for each of your actions. » His suspicious nature soon gives way to physical violence. Women are battered because they do not act in a manner that these men deem fit. » Such men do not miss any opportunity to insult, deride, and demotivate the woman in their life. What Makes the Woman Stay? The most intriguing question then, is that why do women slug it out in stifling relationships like these? What makes them stick around with a man who completely trashes their self-esteem? The answer, as expected, is not as easy. It's hard to say why women continue the drudgery, that is, their life with a man who so obviously doesn't care for them. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that a controlling man has his fiendish torture disguised in ample amounts of apparent love. For instance, he keeps his woman from getting a job so that she stays dependent on him. Further, he makes her feel like she is the princess, and he, the provider. Soon enough though, the woman realizes that it's all a ploy to keep her trapped in marriage/relationship that is based on inequality. Since he has already sapped her confidence, the woman continues to believe that she is incapable of starting her life afresh, independently. Many times, it is hard for the woman to distinguish genuine concern from acute manipulation that these controlling men display. Very soon, the woman firmly believes that this is what she deserves, and all the abuse is the result of her naivety, rather than the man's dominating nature. Such men skillfully manage to alienate the woman from her family and friends, so that her dependence on him keeps growing. Things complicate further if there are children involved. It has been observed that young boys often go on to imitate the actions of the controlling parent and become abusers themselves. Even otherwise, it can be safely said that the children who witness abusive relationships from close quarters do suffer from its consequences in their adult life. A good relationship builds its foundation on equality and harmony. It starts to crumble at the first signs of imbalance. To be satisfied, you need to feel that your partner regards you with respect and openness. Any relationship that keeps holding you from happiness is simply not worth the trouble. For the scores of women who find themselves in such a hapless situation, all you need to do is seek out help and get yourself the life you truly deserve.