how to overcome perfectionism in children
How to Overcome Perfectionism in Children
Dealing with your child's perfectionism can be a tough nut to crack. It not only takes a toll on you, but also shakes up your child in a lot of ways. It's imperative that you imbibe this quality in your child very gradually, so that it doesn't seem like a sudden jolt.
- Make your child talk about his mistakes and help him express his grief, anger and frustration. Venting out and sharing feelings brings objectivity to the situation.
- Every mistake can be rectified by learning something from it. Thus, every failure gives one the opportunity to perform better the next time. If this is the lesson your child takes home, the perfectionist in him will soon be a realist!
- Teach your child coping skills, help him see the importance of second chances and forgiveness.
- Give your child opportunities, which will help him explore his talents, hone his skills and improve his self-confidence.
- Words of encouragement and acknowledgment of your child's strengths, efforts and accomplishments, will boost his confidence and make him take up more challenges with positivity and optimism.
- As parents and teachers begin to recognize child's virtues, it helps a child to recognize the same too.
- Constructive observations and criticisms with solutions, can help your child see what went wrong and how to rectify the problem the next time.
- Strictly avoid comparing your child with his peers, as it will worsen the problem. It will only make your child agitated and intensify the perfectionist in him.
- Reducing pressures of extra curricular activities and academics, will provide your child a breather and scope to understand himself better.
- Help your child set realistic standards as opposed to preposterous goals. This goes a long way in helping the child comprehend his strengths and weaknesses.
- Encourage your child to interact with peers of his age, to know his social standing, to be more tolerant towards others, realize his social behavior and understand that it is not always important to achieve something.
- Developing effective communication skills, which aid in expression, venting of emotions, enhancing insight and honing active listening skills also subdue perfectionism in children, as they learn to take in suggestions.
- Make your child understand that it is only human to make mistakes and not much can be earned or accomplished without making them. When a child learns that mistakes are a part of growing up, it makes them explore new things.
- Teaching them to learn from their own mistakes, will indirectly teach them troubleshooting and problem solving.