long distance marriage advice

Long Distance Marriage Advice

It can become increasingly difficult to cope with distance in marriages. Here is some long distance marriage advice, which will help you strengthen your relationship even further....

Marriages are built on trust, mutual respect and most importantly communication. Long distance marriages are dreaded by a majority of couples who fear that it will ruin their relationship. The genesis of discord erupts from fear of losing one another, which then progresses into mistrust and suspicion. It is possible to sustain a healthy and rewarding relationship with your spouse, during a long distance marriage. Having faith in the fidelity and integrity of your partner can help the relationship evolve and mature into so much more than before. For two individuals who wish to grow old together, it is important that they learn to respect and understand each other completely. This article is dedicated for giving you some simple and easy to follow, long distance marriage advice. Long Distance Marriage Problems Before we dwell into the ways in which you can help save your marriage, it is important to understand the difficulties faced by most couples. Here are some being mentioned below
  • Fear of growing distant mentally and emotionally.
  • Fear that one spouse will begin to cling to the other and act needy, while the other may not respond or may act indifferent.
  • Fear that either of the spouse may cheat and have an affair or get involved in one night stands.
  • Fear that the children may not be able to deal with the distance, and will cause too much stress for the parent who's staying with the kids.
  • That one parent will not be able to give any attention to the children and will feel left out of the family.
  • Fear that arguments and fights may increase due to misunderstandings and possessiveness.
  • Fear that the children's performance at school and general behavior may undergo drastic changes. Ones which will need improvement.
  • Too much of responsibilities on the spouse left with the house and children, apart from dealing with their own job etc.
Long Distance Marriage Tips
  1. Try to talk to each other about your fears and what all you think will go wrong after the long distance begins. If there is anything that will help you save your marriage, it is proper communication. Try to chalk out a daily routine together, wherein the two of you can get to spend quality time speaking to each other over the phone, or through chat and video conferencing. It is important that the two of you keep in touch and communicate as often as possible.
  2. Make the kids speak to the parent every day. Give the parent and children enough time to speak about the day's events. This will keep both the parties happy and at peace.
  3. In order to maintain a long distance relationship with your spouse, you must try not to pass judgments and make accusations without valid proof. Garner respect for each other, and treat one another with affection. Trust is very essential. Therefore, make sure that you do not indulge in activities which may cause the other to feel suspicious or cheated. Similarly, do not accuse the other of misdemeanor without knowing the complete truth.
  4. Try not to feel unnecessarily possessive, as that will suffocate the other and make them wish for space. Remember, the two of you are already away from each other, possessiveness will increase the distance between you even further. This distance however will be more difficult to deal with as it was created due to emotional and mental unhappiness.
  5. Make the best of the time devoted for each other by sharing a sense of humor, naughtiness, and love. Let one another know how much you miss them and how you wish to see them sooner than later. Do fun things together even when you're apart, such as watching a favorite movie/show from your respective homes. Playing online games together and keeping a tab on the score.
  6. If possible try to visit your spouse every once in a while. If not, send cards, letters, emails, and small gifts such as photos of you and the children. This is to show you miss them and are constantly thinking of them.
  7. Do not use the time you spend talking to each other on complaining about all that is going wrong. Tell them that everything will be fine and that both of you can deal with it as long as you're together. There is not much that the other can do to make your situation better, while being so far away. A few words of love and care are all that is needed to make anyone feel stronger to deal with life's hurdles! So be there for one another.
  8. Just because you are not geographically in the same place, does not mean that you have to make up for lost time by speaking on the phone a lot. When there isn't much left to talk about, don't drag the conversation as it might lead into an argument. Just say what you need to, listen to whatever your spouse has to say and thereafter affectionately hangup.
  9. There will be times when one of you or the both of you have had a particularly hard day and are feeling put off and cranky. In such situations, it is better to avoid a prolonged conversation and sleep it off. If your spouse has been looking forward all day to speak to you, entertain them a while and be happy with the thought that you're still needed and cared for. Which is why you must treat them with the same affection and care.
  10. Never-ever think that you're the lone warrior in the relationship and the only one suffering or taking the chunk of stress. We all have our own side to a story, and you'd be surprised how much the other person is dealing with on the other side home. It is easy to think that the ones left at home with the family have it easier, or the spouse living in a hotel and meeting new people and seeing new places has it better. However, each spouse would have a different perspective to the situation, if a third-party were to ask them. Think about it. Who would want to sleep in a lone bed in an unknown hotel room, or be alone at a home which was once bustling with activity, when each of them could be with one another enjoying a nice time together? Do not play the blame game and remember that a relationship is about 'Us' and not solitary individuals.
That's about all you need to do in order to ensure your marriage stays secure and happy. Nonetheless, these seemingly simple tips mentioned above are by no means a simple feat to achieve. They need patience, dedication and a lot more of mutual trust. This of course cannot be a one-sided endeavor and both the spouses must put in efforts to see that the marriage is a success. Hopefully you found these suggestions helpful.

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