famous quotes by ogden nash
55 Famous Quotes by Ogden Nash
Ogden Nash was one of the great American poets, who loved to play with words. He was known for his funny, sarcastic, and thought-provoking verses. This Buzzle article pays a tribute to this man by compiling some of his famous quotes.
From His A - Z List!
He wrote a poem as a tribute to great baseball players, in an alphabetical order. Some examples are -
★ C is for Cobb, Who grew spikes and not corn, And made all the basemen, Wish they weren't born.
★ G is for Gehrig, The Pride of the Stadium; His record pure gold, His courage, pure radium.Quotes by Ogden Nash
Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker.
To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up.
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.
Some pains are physical, and some pains are mental, but the one that's both is dental.
Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.
I have an idea that the phrase "weaker sex" was coined by some woman to disarm the man she was preparing to overwhelm.
Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else.
Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave when they think that their children are naive.
The door of a bigoted mind opens outwards so that the only result of the pressure of facts upon it is to close it more snugly.
If you don't want to work you have to work to earn enough money so that you won't have to work.
Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you.
Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but it's very funny - Did you ever try buying them without money?
There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball, and that is to have either a clear conscience or none at all.
Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore.
Progress is a fine thing, but it's gone on long enough.
Parsley is gharsley.
Where there is a monster, there is a miracle.
The cow is of the bovine ilk; one end is moo, the other milk.
Either you get eaten by a wolf today or else the shepherd saves you from the wolf so he can sell you to the butcher tomorrow.
The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we quit it with regret; we make up our minds every night to leave it early, but we make up our bodies every morning to keep it late.
People who have what they want are fond of telling people who haven't what they want that they really don't want it.
I dreamt that my hair was kempt. Then I dreamt that my true love unkempt it.
A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.
When grandparents enter the door, discipline flies out the window.
Progress might have been alright once, but it has gone on too long.
The trouble with a kitten is that eventually it becomes a cat.
I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless the billboards fall, I'll never see a tree at all.
Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.
Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.
People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.
A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.
I would live all my life in nonchalance and insouciance, Were it not for making a living, which is rather a nouciance.
No, you never get any fun out of the things you haven't done.
One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you set about retiring them.
I do not like to get the news, because there has never been an era when so many things were going so right for so many of the wrong persons.
I hope my tongue in prune juice smothers, If I belittle dogs and mothers.
The most exciting happiness is the happiness generated by forces beyond your control.
Women would rather be right than reasonable.
I think remorse ought to stop biting the consciences that feed it.
The only people who should really sin are the people who can sin and grin.
Every New Year is the direct descendant, isn't it, of a long line of proven criminals?
Every Englishman is convinced of one thing, viz.: That to be an Englishman is to belong to the most exclusive club there is.
Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.
Professional men, they have no cares; whatever happens, they get theirs.
Remorse is a violent dyspepsia of the mind.
There are people who are very resourceful, at being remorseful, and who apparently feel that the best way to make friends is to do something terrible and then make amends.
Too clever is dumb.
Do you think my mind is maturing late, or simply rotted early?
I claim there ain't Another Saint As great as Valentine.
If called by a panther, don't anther.
Man is a victim of dope
In the incurable form of hope!
There's nothing that keeps its youth,
So far as I know, but a tree and the truth.
How easy for those who do not bulge
To not overindulge!
I am tarred and feathered with Time.